Let’s face it, life isn’t always going to be in perfect alignment 24/7. Life happens, stress occurs and bills need to get paid. What if I was to tell you that perfect balance doesn’t really exist, does that make you feel unsettled? Like, “what do you mean we can’t achieve perfect balance and harmony in our lives?” Well, I guess we can if we have no stress, nothing to do and sit around all day, but even that way of living isn’t remotely close to what I define as balance.
Sure, there’s times where we might feel life flows more effortlessly, we are less inclined to snap at others because we’re well rested or have more time to play. However, for most of us, this really is almost nonexistent. By no means am I trying to be a Debbie Downer or pessimist, I’m just trying to throw a bone that’s a little more realistic and doable.
Here’s where I’m going with this….while life can’t always be balanced and secure, we can try our best to achieve balance within the hierarchy of the piece that’s taking precedent over the others. Let me give you an example:
Let’s say you have a family of 4, work full time and are the bread winner in the family. Your work schedule demands 80% of your time, your husband helps around the house with the duties and kids but often times you’re struggling to keep your head above water. Life and your circumstances demand a lot of your time and energy and your reserves are pretty taped out on a daily basis. Does this sound in balance with you? Probably not, based on how we look at it. So, let’s break it down:
Work: 80%
Family: 10%
Everyday life responsibilities: 10%
Of course your work is overriding the other areas of your life so to say your life is balanced? Not so much. To each is own, maybe this is a perfect balance to someone other than ourselves and that’s great. We’re all different.
Here’s where I’m going with this. I, no doubt think you can achieve a bit more stability in your life with that 80%, but it’s going to require just a weeiii bit more effort. I know, you’re thinking, how on earth can I give anymore? I promise, it can be done, just be patient with it.
What if we created more of an organic ebb and flow with that 80%? Remember, whatever your breakdown is is what your life looks like, maybe your household and kids take up 80%, it’s all dependent upon the individual.
Okay, so with that 80%…..what if we threw in an hour of self-care a few times a week? Maybe you get a massage, maybe you go for a walk outside with a friend or you take a moment to decompress in your car for 5 minutes before you walk inside from work? What if we took one night a week to put our phones away and spend more time with our family? Maybe you and your husband create a Friday night date night 1x a month to keep the spark alive? Sure, our 80% still might be there, but we’re finding other ways to help create a bit more balance in that 80%. Does that make sense?
Does this take effort and a bit of change on our part? Of course, but long term this can offset some of the other stuff. While we can’t give or tap our reserves even more than we already are, we’re able to throw in sprinkles of self-care and time with our family. This in turn can evolve into a bit more harmony and contentment in our current routine.
So, I challenge you to draw up a pie, or write on a sheet of paper of what takes up MOST of your time and find a way to dissect that area a little bit. Again, throw in those little sprinkles of quality time, self-care and find ways to dedicate specific days/times to schedule other priorities of your life. Does this ultimately create a state of balance? Not necessarily, because whatever your one thing is that takes up most of your time won’t ever fully balance out, you can however, toss some of those speckles of other stuff in there and that’s what can make a world of a difference. That’s where the happiness factor arrives more and we feel just a little bit more at peace and tranquility. And-most importantly, we owe that to ourselves and loved ones.
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